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Clearly, Steve was firmly in the friend zone...
Again.
"Listen man, I'm a decent-looking, fairly normal guy with a good, steady job...and I really don't have much trouble making friends with women or men...I just don't seem to be able to spark ATTRACTION in women or make that SEXUAL connection with women that I want to make with certain women," Steve continued.
I could see the frustration in his face...
"Also, my experiences with women are all over the map:
Sometimes, women banish me to the friend zone right away, almost as if I have a 'let's just be friends' sign posted to my forehead...
Other times they just STOP RESPONDING TO MY TEXTS without ever explaining why...
And, every once in a while, a girl actually agrees to go out with me. Then, once we go on a couple of dates and I start thinking things are going really well with her, all of a sudden she DISAPPEARS on me without explanation...
And, I even managed to get one official girlfriend back in my college days...However, she chose me and she made all of the 'moves...' I really had nothing to do with it.
And, of course, she broke up with me too after a few months because she said I was 'too boring' and 'too nice.'
I don't even know what that means."
Well, it means that Steve had a serious problem: He was unable to make women FEEL STRONG EMOTIONS for him and that made it impossible for him to attract women the way he wanted to.
Now, according to Steve, being friend-zoned by Vanessa was even more frustrating than usual...
Because, as we talked about already, Vanessa's amazing.
He really thought she could be "the one..."
So, being friend-zoned by a girl like that finally spurred him into ACTION.
Steve finally got angry enough that he decided to handle this part of his life once and for all:
"I HAVE TO solve this attracting women thing or DIE trying..." He said to himself that night.
And at that exact moment, Steve committed himself to learning the art of attracting women no matter the cost...
Peter Pickup Artist - Not really Steve's style...
So the first thing he did was go online and find a bunch of articles about dating for men...
And then that led him to several "pick-up artist" forums.
And, once he found other guys in his area that were interested in improving with women as well, he gave them a fair shot:
Steve spent some time hanging out with them - going out once a week, going to some seminars, reading the books they recommended, and even talking to a few women.
However, Steve told me, "I never liked the idea of 'tricking' women into anything or putting women down, I didn't like memorizing long conversation 'routines' - I felt like a ROBOT, I didn't like all the 'cheap attention-getting tactics' most of the guys were using, and it didn't seem like the 'tactics' I learned were working with the girls I REALLY wanted."
Steve just wanted to know how to attract that girl at his office party or the coffee shop or the bar he goes to once in a while.
All while wearing his normal clothes.
So, Steve kept looking...
He read a few "relationship books" and found them mostly written from the female perspective for people who are already in relationships; he didn't find them helpful AT ALL for building ATTRACTION.
Steve even found a "movement" of men that promoted giving up on dating women completely...
Well, for Steve, he liked the personal development aspects of that movement, yet he just didn't believe that GIVING UP COMPLETELY was the solution he was looking for.
He knew that there were definitely "bad" women out there that we should AVOID at all costs...
However, he also understood that there are also TONS of great women out there too.
And, while WORSHIPING women is going way too far:
Desiring women is a really good, natural thing.
Steve just wanted to attract high-quality women using his own natural style in a way that fits his personality.
So, he kept looking for someone who could teach him how to do exactly that.
"Who has achieved the kind of RESULTS I'm looking for with w